PAULINE HUYNH

From the middle school diaries that started it all

ALL THINGS EDUCATION

Another AMA Meeting Done ✓

I ducked out early to catch a flight, but what a beautiful delegation of student members.

How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard. -Winnie the Pooh

Oh, how to put my feelings into words.

I guess I can start with my initial hesitation with even joining the American Medical Association, given its history of staunchly conservative views on healthcare. Moreover, after witnessing the 2016 elections through a lens of financial corruption – or money in politics as a whole – I struggled to reconcile the fact that I would be joining of the largest lobbying organizations on the Hill in order to advocate for my future patients. Is there room in the AMA for me, as a future physician, to pursue progressive health policies, or am I deluding myself into thinking I can make a difference?

Now, three national conferences, over ten resolutions,and 4 leadership positions later, I cannot express the love I have for this organization – or more specifically, for its Medical Student Section. Reuniting with students from all over the nation who share a desire to advocate for our patients and profession, pushing the boundaries of AMA policy to take stances on pressing national issues, and learning from the breadth of perspectives has been invaluable. The passionate conversations I engage in with other students here are unlike any other I’ve had, and my experiences within the AMA continue to enrich my medical education in ways that are difficult to articulate. Moreover, the MSS provides me with a set of tools with which to respond to the rapid news cycle around me and public health crises.

I am so incredibly proud to partake in a historic AMA Meeting where the MSS, in collaboration with other sections and councils, voted to:

  • encourage raising the minimum age of purchasing guns from 18 to 21
  • recognize feminine hygiene products as medical necessities
  • oppose the routine separation of immigrant families at the border
  • study the loopholes of the Orphan Drug Act
  • oppose the arming of teachers as a way to address gun violence
  • support the closing of loopholes that allow people with a legal history of domestic abuse to buy or own guns
  • support measures that allow courts, upon a relative’s request, to remove guns from homes in which a person is imminently violent or suicidal
  • study targeted unhealthy food advertising toward vulnerable populations, including black and Latino youth
  • emphasize that the HPV vaccination is an anti-cancer vaccination
  • support the treatment of opioid use disorders in hospitals
  • study the use of single payer systems, with the possibility of removing the organization’s staunch anti-single payer policy in order to entertain all health payer models in future discussions
  • protect the rights of LGBTQIA+ physicians and patients
  • among so much more

And I am so incredibly proud to return from the meeting and read tweets online from physicians who have decided to rejoin the organization because they feel that the AMA finally represents them. Words cannot describe how I feel knowing that I’ve contributed, in some small way, to making the the largest physician-based lobbying organization more inclusive and progressive in order to better advocate for our patients. I cannot express the absolute joy (and, admittedly, exhaustion) I feel when I attend these meetings, knowing that I’m surrounding myself with fiery young professionals who are willing to write and review resolutions between classes or clinic days in order to care for the patient population at large.

And I fully acknowledge the irony as someone who, despite wanting to get money out politics, has gotten deeply involved with one of the largest, if not the largest, medical lobbying organization in the country. So I will say this:

Me wanting to get money out of politics has not changed. If there is a bill calling for public campaign financing or a case to overturn Citizens United, I will be the first to support it and draw attention to it.

However.

To my knowledge, the American Medical Association is one of the easiest ways for me to help influence the health policy sphere given our current political system. Moreover, this past meeting in particular demonstrated that the organization is capable of evolving on its policies and take bold positions to help guide national discourse on heavy topics.If my involvement in the AMA will help the organization take stances that will benefit my future patients – because the other dozens of lobbying organizations on the Hill won’t – then so be it. I accept this temporary solution.

But truly, thank you for the AMA-MSS for giving me hope for what the future of organized medicine looks like. Thank you for allowing and encouraging me to grow as a person and a young professional. And thank you for continually inspiring me to be the best physician I can be. Thank for reminding me that, indeed, #MembersMoveMedicine.

I’m really glad I have a snarky filter.

Barista: Your coffee is free, so you can have 2 shots of espresso, or you can even like 4 if you want.

Me, internally: My goal today is to study the tachyarrhythmias, not experience them firsthand.

Me, externally: Just 2 shots is fine, thanks!

M1 and Done ✓

This post is over a week late because just the mere thought of writing it continues to overwhelm me, not to mention the fact that it’s been a while since I’ve written anything.

In short: I survived! /endpost

But in all serious, what a year it has been. I don’t think I could’ve expected to learn so much in one year, both inside and outside the classroom. Anatomy, SFM, GTS. But also CFM, LAC, and SC. Thank goodness for a true pass/fail curriculum, because I don’t know if I would be able to have a life outside the classroom without it.

Things I Somewhat Expected:

  • Losing sleep
  • Learning to love coffee
  • Gradually skipping lecture once anatomy ended
  • Learning to cook
  • Learning to budget
  • Staying up to date on the election and policies following it
  • Exploring Baltimore

Things I Did Not Expect:

  • Gradually ignoring lectures completely and easing off of Sensei
  • Balancing the savings vs time spent cooking (it’s hard if you’re cooking for one)
  • The amount of pizza I can eat in a week (thanks, student orgs)
  • How quickly some cliques can form in medical school
  • How moving across the country doesn’t automatically make me more extroverted
  • Deviating more towards policy and public health vs strictly clinical medicine

I think one thing that…disappointed(?) me was the fact that I thought being immersed in a new environment would force me to be more outgoing and extroverted. Personalities don’t change like that. Going out every week isn’t for me, and neither is splurging on dinner multiple times a week. Sometimes, I wonder if it’s because I chose to live on my own in the middle of downtown instead of sharing an apartment with classmates in the “luxury”-styled comlex right next to campus. (I couldn’t justify the cost and inconvenience. I just couldn’t.) It definitely would’ve made attending late-night gatherings and inviting people to events easier.

But on the flip side, I think this year has taught me to feel very comfortable with myself, and to be comfortable with the concept of solitude. I went out on weekends, trying out different restaurants, visiting museums, strolling the harbor. More importantly, I have grown comfortable doing so on my own, not worrying about scheduling conflicts or bothering others with my spontaneous decisions.

In terms of interests outside the classroom, I guess I wasn’t prepared to become as interested in policy and public health. Politics is exhausting – especially with this past election cycle and current administration. It pains me to think about the impact of 45’s and Congress’s initiatives on social and public health necessities. It’s made me distrusting of politicians and legislators, and at first, I resisted getting involved with the AMA on a deeper level because of it. (Also, that endorsement of Tom Price…why) But I’ve learned that it’s important to still try to implement change, and attending Annual-17 gave me so much hope that the Medical Student Section, at least, was progressive-leaning. The future of our profession is thinking in a different direction.

As summer continues, I’m keeping my fingers crossed that my research progresses well (why are there so few Asian people in Baltimore omg)! Hopefully, I can schedule a time to fly home soon.

 

Hello, 2017.

It’s been a while since I’ve written any sort of yearly reflection, but I think 2016 calls for it.

What a year.

I tried so hard to write this yesterday and get it out “on time” before 2017 arrives, but I simply couldn’t (and frankly, still can’t) find the words.

Personally and professionally, 2016 has been an amazing year. I was beyond fortunate to have gained acceptances from 3 amazing schools, followed by an acceptance to the institution of my dreams. I’m surrounded by family, friends, and colleagues who support my endeavors, and with whom I am lucky to share this journey. I moved from coast to coast and got to experience seasons, from the blasted summer humidity to the biting winter winds. (I saw naturally fallen snow for the first time in…14 years?) I truly lived on my own for the first time, immersing myself in urban living – metro rides, city scapes, price gouging, and all.

Academically, I’ve learned so much, and I’m so excited to continue learning.

However, when I think beyond myself, 2016 was a shitty year. (Maybe the previous years have been just as bad, but I haven’t been paying attention?) The election results pain me; their implications even more so. Tragic, senseless deaths are abundant.

#BlackLivesMatter. Aleppo. Pulse.
Talks of a Muslim registry.
Laws further restricting reproductive rights.

In the midst of it all, I often find myself struggling to process everything. How do I give social injustices and tragedies the outrage they deserve while staying caught up on coursework? (The answer, I learned, is to just cut back on sleep.) What should I prioritize, and when? Half the time I find myself doing whatever “feels right,” even if it’s fleeting.

Overall, 2016 was a year of tremendous growth. I hope I’ll be able to say the same thing about 2017.

One Week In

and I’ve already learned that good coffee is life.

It’s been over one month since I’ve moved to Baltimore, and it’s been…a lot. I’ve tried writing about this for a while, but it’s hard to describe so many new experiences. To be honest, I don’t feel the urge to write about it now, but I know I will regret it in the future if I don’t document at least a few snippets down.

The weather has cooled down a bit. It’s still sunny and humid, but it wasn’t as terrible as it was a month ago, when a 10 minute walk outside left me with nasty sweat stains. Downtown Baltimore is much more…hilly, than I expected. I get a lot of exercise just trying to walk around.

The first few days were an adjustment. So many new places to see, errands to run, furniture to buy. I used a ZipCar for the first time and went to Ikea. I walked to local markets. I spent a few days trying to work out and get into a healthy lifestyle, then gave up and started doing Blogilates at home because I enjoyed it more. I spent a lot of time decorating my place, and did a lot of online shopping.

But when the family came to visit…they did not like Baltimore at all HAHAHA. I expected it, though it doesn’t make the week any bit less tense. Having gotten used to living in manicured suburbia, urban living was a shock to them. Baltimore was a shock to them, its racial and socioeconomic demographic especially so. It shocked (and frankly, infuriated) my parents when they found out I knew this about Baltimore and still chose to attend.

And that’s where we differ.

My dad spent his entire life dragging himself from poverty. His experiences are his own and perfectly valid, but they aren’t everyone’s. Having lived in downtown LA, I don’t feel as uncomfortable in Baltimore. In fact, I feel quite comfortable now, although there’s always common sense. Moreover, a good portion of my decision to apply and attend Hopkins is ultimately because of Baltimore. Although my initial impression of the area aren’t favorable (I’ve documented them in my interview reflection, and even listed it as a “con” of Hopkins), I’ve come to learn and absolutely appreciate it as a community.

As someone who is interested in learning more about public health and health care disparities, especially over the past year, I’ve realized that there are few places that would teach me as much as Hopkins and Baltimore. The communities are dynamic, and the public is learning to take action in its own hands.

</tangent>

While my folks and brother were here, we spent the week doing massive grocery (read: Costco and HMart) hauls and did some touristy things. We toured Washington DC (which my dad hated the minute he realized it meant walking outside in east coast humidity for hours) and visited Atlantic City. We talked along the Inner Harbor, and spent some time with an extended relative. It was a fun, if not stressful, week.

Orientation was…exhausting. They definitely tried to cram too many events in two days, and everyone was too tired to truly socialize. (Actually, I take that back; those who live right by campus definitely socialized.)

We spent the next three days learning about health care disparities, and although long, I felt that Hopkins nailed it in turns of application. We had to do a community service project in one of East Baltimore’s communities, and I honestly learned so much about myself and my privilege, what public health means to these community members, and how clinicians in Baltimore should be cognizant of the community dynamics.

And then anatomy hit. I have never been so grateful for weekends and strong coffee.

The pacing is overwhelming a lot of the times, and I’ve begun to understand what the upperclassmen were saying when they advised us to go through the material multiple times. I don’t get it the first pass; I barely understand 50% of it the second time around. I think I’ve run through last week’s material a total of 4 times:

  • once the day before
  • once during lecture and lab
  • once after class
  • during the weekends.

I try cycling through different mediums to prevent myself from being passive:

  • skimming presentations before
  • reading the lab dissector
  • typing notes in lecture
  • summarizing/writing notes by hand post-lecture
  • coloring structure and reviewing material in Netter’s Anatomy Coloring Book (a God-send)
  • creating weekly study guides that compile all the data

It’s so much repetitive work, but until I take my first exam, I won’t know how much to study.

My classmates have been amazing though. Everyone is still very close, though with a class size of 120, there are still many faces I have not met. There’s no doubt that those who live “on campus” are a clique of their own though. Everyone is super bonded, and there are definitely times when I questioned my decision to live downtown, despite the amenities and conveniences regarding food and groceries. I try to integrate myself by attending events, but it’s not the same as a true “dorm” experience.

Overall, it’s been an exciting month. We’ll see how September goes!

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Pauline

I am a resident physician who enjoys writing about her life in between deadlines, kitten cuddles, and caffeine-fueled adventures. I write primarily for myself, but would love to share the journey with you.

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